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CABINET OF CURIOSITIES (NEW CONCEPTS)
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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I just find it bizarre why landlords moan about poor tenants.

You're not going all Marxist-Leninist n us, are you, Wiley? We try to solve problems here not moralise about them.

They can pay somebody else to let their property for them for a fee, they can get insurance to cover themselves against the risk. They can sell up, their estate agent will most probably tell them that at least some of their prospective buyers are landlords looking to buy and let this property out or maybe run it as a commercial AirBnB.

You would think so, wouldn't you? But since hardly any of them do I expect there is some reason they don't. But we are not concerned with landlords per se, we are concerned with the supply of rented housing, so it makes no difference whether it is landlords or landlords' agents that are affected.

I can only put it down to the fact that they simply don't want to tell the rest of the world how lucky they are, as if they did, surely everyone would be letting, and then there might be increased competition to drive up standards.

Well, everyone was until recent (Tory) changes stopped 'everyone' doing so and rented stock was turned into owner-occupier stock. I am all for competition but to work there has to be unfettered supply and demand. That is the last thing there is at the moment, on either side of the equation.

That must be it.

Your smugness is becoming astronomical.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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I do get grumpy about landlords complaining about tenants, and farmers complaining about weather. It triggers me. Apologies.
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Mick Harper
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I had a Tesco Chicken Chow Mein in the fridge so I thought, "I know, I'll cook some rice to go with it. Noodles on their own are somehow unsatisfying." So halfway through cooking the rice I put the Chow Mein in the microwave. Except it turned out to be Sweet and Sour Chicken and Rice. Doh!

I couldn't waste the rice--I'm a pensioner, I don't know if I've mentioned it--so I ended up with Sweet and Sour Chicken and Rice and rice. Which is an abomination any way you look at it. There may be something about it in Leviticus. Quite nice though and I finished the lot so all's well that ends well.
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Mick Harper
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Sarcasm or Truth?

Mark Laflamme wrote:
A Taste of Normandy: Apples, Camembert, and Duck
Savouring the Seasonal Flavours of Autumn in the Land of the Vikings

Mick Harper wrote:
I was going to critique the foodie stuff but remembered just in time I know nothing about the subject. So it will have to be the history about which I am, as one knowledgeable person observed, the Escoffier of historians. If my mum could be described as knowledgeable.

First off, the cession was in 911 which is often characterised as the tenth rather than the eighth century. Second of all, none of them were Vikings, though that remans a matter of dispute so you're off the hook on that one. I wish I hadn't bothered now.

Mark Laflamme wrote:
Thanks so much, Mick. This is honestly the best response I've ever had to a story.
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Mick Harper
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Says It All

The Satirical Papers THE page for political satire. This page is left leaning political satire. If you are critical of the left, this is not your place.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Does Agent Scully's book "Want" about her sexual fantasies contain anything about a desire for scrawny, ravenous, hyper-intelligent, trickster types, with a love for invention?

Just asking, as £19.00 seems a bit steep, if it doesn't.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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I wouldn't pay that much to share them with her directly. I'd go a tenner.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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Shopping News

I have been mainlining recently on Soba Noodles. It says 'wok-style' but don't be fooled. You pour boiling water in, wait three minutes, pour the water out via the holes provided and enter a world of heaven. Get down there before word is out and the shelves bare.

Speaking of which there wasn't much at the Tesco Cheapskates' Corner except, you'll never guess, beef'n'tomato flavour Pot Noodles. Now fair's fair, after fifty years I ought to check them out to see if they might by now be approaching Soba standards. It was a bit worrying there was a sign next to them saying 'Doggie Treats' but I assumed this was left by lackadaisical Tesco staff. You need a degree. And anyway, at £1.85 for four Pot Noodles, I won't mind sharing.

'No, naughty dog, three for Micky and one for you. All right, two each but that's my final offer. Come back, I was joking.' Good job he can't read or he'll be after my Soba. I wouldn't share them with the lady wife. She can't read either. Well, not in English.
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Mick Harper
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Am I remembering this right?

Cappelli, MFA, JD, PhD on Medium wrote:
Mom, You Can’t Say That! Lessons from the family word police
Yesterday, I played soccer with my nine-year-old granddaughter, Izzy, as she was getting ready for the season. I used to let her win when we played, but not anymore—she has to earn it now. The score was 2–2; we were both tired but determined. Izzy’s game had remarkably improved — her footwork was sharp, and her focus intense. The game was close, and I was determined to score. As I made a break for her goal, I tripped over the ball, stumbling awkwardly. I laughed, “I’m such a spaz!” Izzy stopped in her tracks and looked at me, her little brow furrowed in concern.
“Grandma, you can’t say that!”
“Say what?” I asked, surprised.
“‘Spaz,’” she replied, crossing her arms like her mom, Emily. “Mom says we shouldn’t use that word. It’s not nice.”

I was surprised that 'spaz' is an everyday word in America.

Mick Harper wrote:
The origin of 'spaz' is actually from kids football (so far as I know). In the England of the 1950's, the Spastics Society had a logo of a small boy in leg calipers and it was a favourite charity of many schools. Naturally we (oh, yes) called anyone playing badly 'a spaz'. This then became a generalised term of abuse. But isn't today. It would be considered grossly insensitive. The Spastics Society renamed itself Scope so it is doubtful if anyone of immature years even knows what a spastic is. I'm not entirely sure myself.

I still don't know what a spastic was. Polio victim?

Tooth Truth Roopa Vikesh wrote:
I did not know that! Thank you for sharing this. A small boy in leg calipers, gosh, I’d remember that one!

Roopa is quite right, you'd never have a boy in calipers as your emblem nowadays. Maybe they should.
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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I still don't know what a spastic was. Polio victim?

It originally referred, specifically, to somebody with cerebral palsy.

I generally use the conflated term 'Spazmong' as a term of endearment for any of my numerous grandkids, family member and close friends (or as a term of derision for just about anybody else) who displays the slightest degree of physical or mental ineptitude.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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I knew a bloke called Chad from Ramsbottom. Look him up on the Electoral Register and say hi! from me.
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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Yeah I know him... Bit of a spazmong.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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And two Gary Nevilles. It may be some sort of government experiment.
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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And two Gary Nevilles.

One of em’s a right gobshite.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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Betty Bassett + 2 others started following you

I knew her brother Bertie.
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